Once upon a time, in a small coffee shop in Upstate New York, Jen convinced Heather that she could run 9.3 miles.
She also convinced her that she could do so alongside one billion (or several thousand) other people in the hot summer sun. Jen also suggested a sleepover in Utica to be nice and close to the start on the big day.
Soon, race day was upon them, and Heather found herself waking just after the sun to prepare for the Boilermaker 15K. It’s true that Heather likes a list, so naturally, she had pooled her nerves into a list making and completing frenzy.
After arriving at the registration tables, Heather was reminded that she was one of thousands setting out to cross the finish line, as she attached her largest number yet: 12709.
She was especially fond of the fact that her name said “Health” rather than “Heather.” This small reminder from the universe [and BranAppetit who graciously footed the entry fee for this race, and took care of pre-registering] was a welcomed break in nervousness, as she reflected on how far she had come in the past two years.
She defined herself with the word “health” in so many ways these days, especially in comparison to the person she was before. She was a healthy living blogger, she makes good choices focused on her health, she believed that evaluation of her health was important. Health was all around her, and now it was calling to her from the bib attached to her body, consuming her thoughts as she prepared for the goal ahead: 9.3 miles, her longest event to date.
With over an hour until the clock started, she prepared herself the best way she knew how. Keeping calm in the car with her journal on her lap, scribbling thoughts as they crept into her clouded mind.
After several minutes of mediation and self evaluation, she was excited to get this show on the road. The nine-point-three mile long road.
Soon it was time to head to the start. Corralled in grey, she chit chatted with her dear friend and greatest encourager, Jen. The girl who convinced her of this crazy plan to start with.
As the minutes until the gun rolled on, Jen realized her wrist was empty – the Garmin was in the car! Knowing that Jen would be disappointed at the finish line if she didn’t have her own personal time to look back on, Heather convinced her to run back to the car to grab it. Jen’s wonderful boyfriend, Chris, who was also running, agreed to accompany Jen on the Garmin-grabbing adventure.
And then Heather was alone. In a sea of strangers. A sea of strangers ready to get their run on. This made Heather even more nervous, but a bit more excited, too.
Then Heather realized that someone near her smelled like beer. When in Utica?
After a few tweets, a lot of eager giggling, and the denouncing of pessimistic thoughts, they were off! Heather tried to take things slowly, but it was a struggle. For the first three miles, each time she looked at her Garmin, she saw a pace starting with an 8 or a 9! She wanted to try to pace between 11:00 and 12:00! Each time she saw these quick paces, she would force herself to drop back down to a slower pace. She tried to run near other runners with similar pacing, but it never lasted long. She was lost in the sky, and the crowd, and all that surrounded her.
When it came to the first crazy hill, she found herself in the perfect position. Behind “pink motivational girl.”
If this were easy, everyone would be doing it.
The miracle isn’t finishing, it’s that I had the courage to start.
Running won’t kill you; you’ll pass out first.
It doesn’t matter how far you got but the distance you traveled from.
Not long after reaching the top of the hill, Heather was especially excited to see Jen approach on her left! Speedy Jen had crossed the start line more than six minutes after Heather, but had managed to catch up with Heather on the golf course. Hooray!
The next mile or so, Heather was able to stay with Jen. Mostly because they were running downhill a lot of the time. Not too much after a mile, however, Jen took off, and Heather started the long road of discouragement.
Prior to the race, Heather had been warned by several running friends than mile six was the worst part. It completely messed with her head. She must have started and stopped running a dozen times between miles six and seven and a half.
By the time she approached mile eight, Heather was thinking mostly negative thoughts.
“I never want to run again.”
”Why did I think this was a good idea?”
”I am not stronger than I think I am – I fail.”
It wasn’t pretty.
She tried to reach inside herself to find the hope. “Less than a mile left,” she thought. “It doesn’t matter if you come in under your goal (2 hours) or not, you are crossing the finish line of a flipping 15K!!!”
Soon she approached the last tenth of a mile, and she sprinted with everything she had left in her. And she crossed that finish line.
And Heather was angry. So, so, angry.
Her anger didn’t make much sense.
She crossed the finish line of her first 15K.
She finished in under 2 hours.
She passed the 10K place marker at a faster time than her 10K PR.
She was still angry.
So she went to the after party.
She drank some water. She found Jen and Chris.
Jen said, “How’d it go?”
Heather said, “ask me tomorrow. I know I’ll feel differently.”
“Do you want to do it again next year?” Jen asked?
”Not now. But maybe tomorrow?” Heather replied.
The party continued and they found the good stuff.
Heather didn’t need beer. She had Chobani. The Cho-staff members were refilling the table like all-stars. They were yogurt sharing monsters! [the good kind of monsters.]
Heather is still processing her time at the Boilermaker 15K, two weeks later.
She thinks that part of the problem was that she didn’t really have a race-running plan. She just went out there and felt off from miles 1-4, and 6-9.
As of today, Heather isn’t sure that Boilermaker 2012 is a good idea.
But earlier this week she started her 17 week training plan for the Stockade-athon 15K in November. She has a feeling it will be awesome. [It’s in November! and starts/ends within walking distance of her apartment!] And she will PR. And she won’t be angry. But she hopes to eat Chobani afterwards, too.
If they had Chobani after every race, you know I’d be there!
My swim coach always used to say to me “if it were easy, everyone would do it” — it’s a great one to live by!
We’ve all got those races that just feel off sometimes…they suck, but they make the great ones that follow feel that much greater. Keep it up girl, you’re doing awesome! So, so proud of you!
Not every race is perfect, and not every race will give you those great feelings, but YOU DID IT! I am so, so proud of you
And I love that they had your name as “Health”
Post-race grub makes it all worth it.
I love this race report, Heather- it’s very real and honest. I can’t believe you were running 8-9 min mile paces in the beginning- that’s amazing! And that would have killed me, haha. The course is so intense. I know you’re disappointed in yourself but you should feel incredibly proud- it is such a tough race and you did really well- crossing the finish line of that race is an amazing accomplishment in my mind. When I ran it, I had time goals in mind that I did not meet because 1) hills 2) hello heat.
How exciting that you started training for the stockadeathon! The weather will be a little more conducive to running
Whe I ran my first 1/2 marathon last Thanksgiving I was sure I wouldn’t do it again. I was in such pain after and it took a full week for me to walk without a limp, but I signed up for it again. It can only get better I can’t be afraid and let that dominate me.
Your’re awesome.
Ive nominated you for the butterfly award, check it out here
http://illtake2ofeverything.blogspot.com/2011/07/i-won-award.html
Heather this is a fantastic recap. I love the buildup of your pre-race checklist and scribbling of thoughts! I could feel your jitters when I read it. The Boilermaker was a pretty crazy race, from start to finish. I thought it was an amazing experience and definitely want to do it next year! I think you’re right that perhaps not having a race strategy was what caused you to not enjoy the race as much as you could have. The heat also makes it very VERY difficult to PR, so don’t let that deter you. Glad you enjoyed the post-race party – I was thrilled to see Chobani there too
I’m so proud of you for having that “:)” next to a 5 AM wakeup. that will never, ever happen for me. I’ll do it, but there won’t be any smiling involved. no sir.
I’m sorry that you didn’t feel good about it but seriously good work for doing it anyway and not let your emotions about this one affect your training for the next. If it helps (and even if it doesn’t) I’m totally in awe of your achievement!
Heather you are amazing! Jen did good getting you to do your first 15k and you kicked butt! You inspire me to get my butt back out there…. maybe one year, one race i’ll join you both
I’m so proud of you, Heather. You’re so right when you said “If this were easy, everyone would be doing it.” It’s NOT easy and not many people can say they’ve run a 15K. I sure can’t. Good for you, my friend!
Dearest Heather: this is awesome. So proud of you! You are an inspiration to us all.
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