Today is a day for celebration.  Today is break up day.

Today marks two years.  Two years ago, my fiancé walked up the stairs to my apartment, and spoke words I wasn’t expecting, but have never stopped being thankful for; “I can’t marry you.” he said to me.

——– We interrupt this reflective, impressively strong, overfloweth of words ——–

Hi. It’s me.  Heather.

I started that post up there, it’s true.  I did so because I felt it was owed.

Owed to our story.  It would take us to the next chapter.  Move us forward in the actions, maybe beyond love and hate and into indifference. The two years later epilogue, perhaps; it could help to wrap the big-ole bow around the final presentation of the tale.

Owed to my heart.  And my strength, and my security.   To the process of healing, and growth, and finding oneself again.  All that I know that I am and all that I know I can be.  I owed it to where I have been and to who I will become from here on out.

Owed to you, dear friend and reader.  As if you needed the recognition of today.  Because you’ve heard my whining, and my bitching, and lived along side my heart ache and tears of loneliness, anger, and frustration.  Because of all that, you’ve earned the celebration.  You deserve the homerun post of revelation and inspirational phrasing you reread three times to make sure your heart fully understood my intentions.

I started that post, because I thought it was necessary.  Then I sat here, in front of the screen getting frustrated because it had been two hours and I hadn’t added one word to this piece.  Because I was caught.  I was stuck.  I was immobile.  I felt that I needed to write from one certain perspective, be heard in one single voice, and I didn’t know how to get myself there.

Finally, however, I remembered to come back to the very core of all I wanted THS to be, all I had ever hoped from the beginning.  I realized that I didn’t need to deliver a power ballad.  I needed to strip all the junk away, and type the words my heart speaks naturally, unedited (scary!) – completely raw.

So this is me.  Heather.  I have some things I want to say to you.  I’m sure we will get there eventually. Why don’t you have a seat?  I’ll put on some tea.